Wearing a Mask

family

Battling illness

For such a long time I have been depressed, continually tired and achy, new aches and pains haven’t bothered me. That was until we went away to visit family. I was fine until the Friday (early morning) and woke up with acid reflux which I don’t suffer with very often. After a short time it turned into a sharp pain round my right ribs and a dull ache in my stomach on the right side.

During the day I felt dizzy and vomitted a few times so stopped eating and drinking. We had a chat with a pharmacist who suggested we rang 111. Rick tried on and off for several hours and eventually we ended up at Basildon Hospital at 1am Saturday. After 5 hours, blood taken and still not knowing what was wrong I gave in to Rick about leaving.

Over the weekend the pain didn’t get any better and we decided to come home after lunch round at my sister and brother in law’s. On Monday we finally got through to 111 as we picked up Bandit from the kennels. I was told an ambulance would be sent out so Rick suggested taking me to Darlington Memorial Hospital as we were out.

To be continued ….

Sad day

Today has been the Queen’s funeral and I have followed the main parts of it. It has felt surreal and everybody seems to be struggling to remember not to call King Charles Prince Charles. Personally I think it’s sad that the Royal Family can’t have a private funeral and every day they have had to go to functions or have been out in public.

Since Queen Elizabeth died it’s felt like life is on hold but hope now that the family is left alone. I am wondering how long it will take Meghan Markle to start spouting more vile talk of how terrible the Royal Family are. She has been proven she is a liar and keeps reinventing herself when those around her stop being of any use to her. A little bit of me wonders if the Royal Family will threaten her with legal action if Meghan refuses to shut up. I also wonders if she will eventually dump Harry when he is of no further use to her.

Getting on with life

Last November I had a special birthday, and, Rick and my sister insisted on doing something even though I didn’t really want a fuss. I enjoyed the evening having the family together including Rick’s sisters being there and> one of their husbands. Two friends and their partners were there as well. My cake was enough to make me smile as it was Dr Who themed with the base representing the universe and the top halve having the T.A.R.D.I.S. and a Dalek on it. Part of one of my birthday presents is a T.A.R.D.I.S. biscuit container.

It was funny about half way through the evening as one of my (great) nieces who is 5 years old asked me when I was going to open my presents. Her mum, my niece, gently told her not to be rude and adult birthdays are different from childrens parties. Her face dropped so I asked her if she would like to help me and she immediately smiled. We had been visiting family so were able to see her on her birthday.

Thank you Olivia for making my birthday even more special, your Nanna told me that you, your sisters and cousins like opening other family members birthday presents which made me laugh. I even had help blowing out the candles on the cake from James and Amelia.

Christmas came and went quietly as usual although this time we were able to have our meal out. It isn’t the same these days unlike when we were younger.

We have been away for Rick’s birthday recently to Edinburgh. We managed to see quite a bit of the city centre but there is still more to see if we go back there. One day we went to Dundee which is really nice. The Discovery is there so we had a look round it and the museum.

Our next planned break is in November and we will be staying at Fort William. I have wanted to see that part of Scotland for many years as Glencoe is near there. I am a Macdonald descendent on my maternal line as my Nanna was one. Apparantly there is a monument for the Massacre of Glencoe so even more reason for going there.

More blows for mental health

Well now we can’t go out for our Christmas meal so it’s just as well we hadn’t paid it. Not that the money matters it’s missing out on a relaxing meal in pleasant surroundings, and friendly staff being there. Fortunately we have managed to get a fresh turkey and three joints at a butcher’s at a cheaper price than the supermarkets.

It’s going to be a difficult Christmas for my sister and brother in law as they won’t be able to have a family Christmas this year with tougher restrictions there. Their youngest grandchild is coming up for 7 months old so it’s her first Christmas. We have it better than them as at least we can go out and our bubble is with our friend who lives across the road to us.

All we can hope for is next year is better than this year. My sister and brother in law couldn’t celebrate their 40th Wedding Anniversary they wanted to. We couldn’t meet our latest great niece until she was 5 1/2 months when we were able to go away for a holiday. She is adorable like all the others.

Next year one of her sisters is due to give birth to her third child which is actually a scary time for them. Their second child had Edward’s Syndrome and only lived a day which was sad for them and I am just relieved the family (including us) will never forget her. The hospital is looking after our niece due to what happened with her last pregnancy.,

I’m just struggling with severe depression and anxiety so am finding it hard to look forward to anything.

Having a break

Finally we are having a break from the norm which is a relief. Bandit is enjoying being able to have a run off the lead on the beach and sea, He is such a daft dog as he doesn’t like rain or having a shower but likes going into the sea and rivers.

I needed a break as it has been emotionally difficult through COVID-19 and the selfish idiots haven’t helped either. They do whatever they want then complain about restrictions but they don’t think of others. It’s still stressful but I’m glad we have been able to get away to relax so I’m feeling generally better.

The next hurdle is whether we will be able to see family. It’s been a horrible year as we wanted to see them earlier in the year but lockdown stopped that. I have really missed them since lockdown probably because we couldn’t go and see them. Not being able to see the latest edition has been tough but I have seen her on facetime through Facebook which is better than nothing.