Wearing a Mask

Dark days

I don’t think anybody realized how much COVID-19 would affect our daily lives or how it would globally. On a personal level my anxiety levels have gone through the roof quite a bit. One day, in the early days of lockdown, I had a mini meltdown in Tesco as there was hardly any cat food and what was left was expensive. The next day we went to Darlington as our car needed a new MOT so we went along to the closest shops for something to do. We went into B&M and I was very relieved that there was plenty of cat food there so went back when we collected the car.

Going shopping was stressful when there were stricter rules so more often that not I was wearing a mask. Some days it was unbearable as the weather was so hot. More recently I read about Hidden Disabilities which sell lanyards, cards and other stuff. It helps shop staff aware of people who may need extra help but people can also now buy face mask exemption cards. Legally shops, public areas such as railways etc can insist that people still wear masks. The only place that has insisted that we wear face masks has been our health club but that’s only till we go to the changing rooms and the same leaving.

Both of us are still struggling with depression even though we are getting back to some kind of normality. Neither of us like being out too long but I’m hoping when we go on holiday that it will help our moods.

Wearing a Mask

For most of my life, I have suffered from depression although it was 2005 that I finally accepted that.  I didn’t have any reason to be depressed and I didn’t like feeling unhappy when it reared its ugly head.

When I was 19 years old I had a son who was adopted by forced adoption which is illegal but I didn’t know that until over 23 years later. That was the time when I became severely depressed but I thought it was just postnatal depression.  At the same time, I emotionally shut down and lost trust in everybody.  After all, if I couldn’t trust my family who could I trust?

I also suffer with OCD which I manage quite well most of the time and PTSD but doctors don’t associate that with adoption.