Blog
Too good to be true?
We have had to put up with an idiot neighbour for a few months due to him accusing us of different things. Apparantly we have 10 cats when in reality we have 2 1/2 – one has two homes as one of her sisters lives across the road hence the 1/2 – my husband is a wife beater and a couple of other things. The ‘screams’ he’s heard have been when I have fallen and yelled out for help getting up or when I’ve yelled at our dogs as one was ill so could be aggressive at times. She has since passed on and our other dog has calmed down.
Since then the neighbour as claimed our dog barks 24/7 which isn’t true because we wouldn’t put up with it. When we leave him to go shopping or the health club. Our friend, who is owned by our eldest cat’s sister, will sit with him for 10 minutes so we can slip out or sometimes till we get home. If our dog does bark our friend will check to see if there is a reason but our dog doesn’t bark continuously even then. We suspect the idiot neighbour upsets him by walking past our home but we can’t prove.
The neighbour has threatened my husband then had the cheek to ring the police and claimed he was threatened. On that day he hurled abuse at me after the call as I had gone to our car to get a mobile. What he didn’t know was I had set my mobile to record so when the police came out we were able to prove this. The police weren’t impressed that he had made a claim then was abusive towards me after his phone call.
Right from the first incident the neighbour has been parking his van where we normally park up just to annoy us. He’s has filmed us going from our car to our home, been very noisy and has been spying on us so when we’ve gone out into the garden or come home from an outing he will stand at his gate staring at us until we go in.
A few days ago his van went so we have been able to park up where we have wanted to and he has stopped his bad behaviour. I’m not completely convinced that he’s seen sense that his behaviour has been bad. It could be true or it could be because he has cancer. One of our immediate neighbours recently died due to cancer, yet, he was a lovely neighbour.
I’m still struggling with depression but I am getting there slowly with being motivated.
Dark days
I’m having a really tough time of it being so depressed and haven’t got a clue how to beat it this time. Nothing is working so I’m now at the stage that I’ve lost my appetite and forcing myself to snack even if it’s just a biscuit. Losing weight doesn’t worry me as I need to lose weight anyway but I’m scared that if I do lose weight and cheer up I’ll put the weight back on again.
Even being back to some kind of normality isn’t helping at all. It’s hard work trying to get back into a routine for swimming is a struggle. I have plenty of time yet though to complete my sponsored swim.
I’m hoping our break in October will help a bit with my mood as we haven’t been able to get away this year due to COVID-19. A few days will be spent in Essex after a week in Devon so we can see family. Getting away from an idiot neighbour will be a small relief as well
Dark days
I don’t think anybody realized how much COVID-19 would affect our daily lives or how it would globally. On a personal level my anxiety levels have gone through the roof quite a bit. One day, in the early days of lockdown, I had a mini meltdown in Tesco as there was hardly any cat food and what was left was expensive. The next day we went to Darlington as our car needed a new MOT so we went along to the closest shops for something to do. We went into B&M and I was very relieved that there was plenty of cat food there so went back when we collected the car.
Going shopping was stressful when there were stricter rules so more often that not I was wearing a mask. Some days it was unbearable as the weather was so hot. More recently I read about Hidden Disabilities which sell lanyards, cards and other stuff. It helps shop staff aware of people who may need extra help but people can also now buy face mask exemption cards. Legally shops, public areas such as railways etc can insist that people still wear masks. The only place that has insisted that we wear face masks has been our health club but that’s only till we go to the changing rooms and the same leaving.
Both of us are still struggling with depression even though we are getting back to some kind of normality. Neither of us like being out too long but I’m hoping when we go on holiday that it will help our moods.
Wearing a Mask
For most of my life, I have suffered from depression although it was 2005 that I finally accepted that. I didn’t have any reason to be depressed and I didn’t like feeling unhappy when it reared its ugly head.
When I was 19 years old I had a son who was adopted by forced adoption which is illegal but I didn’t know that until over 23 years later. That was the time when I became severely depressed but I thought it was just postnatal depression. At the same time, I emotionally shut down and lost trust in everybody. After all, if I couldn’t trust my family who could I trust?
I also suffer with OCD which I manage quite well most of the time and PTSD but doctors don’t associate that with adoption.